Spirituality Page

Former president Corazon Aquino was confined in the hospital because of cancer that weakened her. How sweet were the words we uttered after the assassination of Ninoy Aquino in 21 August 1983, “Di ka nagiisa” (You’re not alone). We fought the dictatorship of Ferdinand Marcos with courage – that Ninoy was not alone, that Cory too was not alone.

Central Intelligence Agency (CIA) chief Leon Panetta visited Malacanang. The Abu Sayyaff Group immediately released the remaining hostage Eugenio Vagni just hours before the arrival of the spy. Vagni was one of the three workers of Red Cross who were kidnapped by the Abus in Jolo early this year.

Then Gloria Arroyo has received invitation from Barack Obama’s White House in Washington. And she’s starry-eyed about it. Tongressmen este congressmen dreamed of joining the kleptocratic presidential entourage, there were a hundred of them who filed application for the coveted trip. Unfortunately Malacanang said only seven of them would be accepted.

The national and local synchronized elections in May 2010 is near. While politicians, especially the presidential aspirants, are aspiring for a win – by hook or by crook – the Commission on Elections (Comelec) is still under attack by Harry Roque’s spears. Roque said that the poll automation that the Comelec has pursued violates legal procedures.

We were caught napping when the province of South Jeolla of South Korea leased ninety four thousand hectares (94,000 ha) of farmland in Mindoro. The land will be used to produce corn for food for the Koreans while millions of impoverished Filipinos sleep with empty stomachs. Food prices are soaring, so our stomachs are also soring – yes, sore stomach.

Influenza A (H1N1) scared most of Filipinos that it outlasts dengue and tuberculosis as the lethal threats to health. This led health secretary Francisco T. Duque III to coin his “To-DOH-Alerto” and “OK-DOH-K” fads that lured Malacanang to ask for a P19 billion budget for the secretary’s senatorial bid, este, to fight the swine, este, swine flu, swine flu.

On drugs, Senator Mar Roxas who is eyeing for presidency lambasted Ms Arroyo’s link with giant pharmaceutical companies that bribed the government in order not to implement the law on cheap medicines that the esteemed senator is advotecating, este, advocating.

We boast of the ideals of democracy, transparency and good governance. Yet, we are haunted with tyranny, corruption and bad (if not evil) governance. We are way behind our Southeast Asian neighbors. Indonesia’s democracy is advancing. We are going backward. Vietnam’s economy is moving, we are left behind tailing.

Well, what more of Philippine politics? This is the way we are. But I refuse to believe. Will you?

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No one thought about me twenty nine or thirty years ago. I was not. I did not even exist in the mind of God.

Then when two individuals met – when they had sexual intercourse – a miracle happened, or I will say there was a meeting between the sperm and egg cells. Then a life was formed. After nine months, a male baby was born. It was 12 July 1981. He was named K.

Since I had the consciousness of the reality of existence, I’d been asking the question: What is life? And I would say that life is an interval between birth and death. It is a stage of a journey from nothingness to being and back to nothingness. Cells are formed into a human body, and then cells die. Human life is born, and then it will die. From Spinoza’s perspective of eternity, one will see life as a passing shadow in time – or just an illusion that passes through time and space then disappears.

But I refuse to define or at least to describe life this way. I want to infuse it with more meaning. Yes it is convincing to think that life simply passes – that we are confronted with the reality of aging, then will eventually die. Naturalists say it is a natural process of the cycle of life. But with Heidegger, I think life comes as it is, and that I am being thrown into this world of being, thus I am being in the world. And since I am in the world, I do not just exist. I have my own being – that is, both being to being and being to nothingness.

I exist therefore I live. My being does not rest on the thought that I exist, but because I live. I am no Cartesian to think of the condition of being as existence of the mind and the act of thinking. I am not a thinking or a product of thought. I am simply because there is life that invigorates the flesh of my body. There is no being there who manipulates me in his or her mind. I simply am who thinks, moves, decides, and lives independently from any transcendental beings that are products of the mind’s speculation and imagination.

So now, at least in my own thoughts and reflections about what my life ought to be, I am being haunted with the question: So what’s the meaning of it all? I do not know fully. But at least I can speculate that there may be some kind of meaning to existence.

Yes, I have the will to live. As I live death is haunting me. I don’t want death to invade me and others as of the moment. I want to live fully not just as a human being but also as an individual person who has desires and aspirations in life – a person who hopes about the reality and materialization of the idea that every human individual has life and since life is sacred, thus every human being is significant. Every human being has rights and freedoms.

In a society such as my own, individuals simply disappear. They are abducted by the government. The condition of life of millions of Filipinos is simply awful because of the appalling behavior of many politicians and government leaders.

At twenty eight, what have I done so far? Well, not much. Although I will to live in a society of my own making, I have not done much to improve my condition of living. I have not done much to improve the condition of the life of many. I have not done much to uplift the lives of others.

My friends said that I am too young at twenty eight. I will still experience many crises to come. But I refuse to think such thing; maybe I am too young to have done things that I have idealized. But I am not too young because I already am past a quarter of a century. There are millions of lives there who died young and millions died during infancy. Yes, they’re too young to disappear from this world.

At twenty eight I am too old, and I do not wish to live longer than a lifetime and thus prolong my agony.

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They're all the same.

I am referring, of course, to those who are aspiring to be the next president of the Philippine republic. Chiz Escudero. Manny Villar. Mar Roxas. Gilbert Teodoro. Jejomar Binay. Joseph Estrada. Loren Legarda. Bayani Fernando. Noli De Castro. Yes, you can name other prominent names in the country's political club.

Some of them are really good rhetoricians. Some are 'baduy' - just to get the attention of the public. Many of them have already spent millions of pesos on print, TV and radio ads. And most of them strike against the most unpopular politician of the country today.

They say that they are against corruption. They are against bad governance. They are against everything that is associated with Gloria Arroyo. They are against political monopoly. They are against what the people are against.

In other words they project themselves to be pro-people. They are all pro-voters.

Now, here's the kick. If they really want to serve the people and seek to identify with the people in order to get the votes of the people - then, they have to live with the people in order for them to really feel and understand the needs and aspirations of the people.

These presidential aspirants live in posh villages driving luxurious cars - and yet they project themselves on TV that they were once poor (Villar), or at least, they can do "padyak" to transport the poor from one status of life to another (Roxas).

They say that they are against corruption and waste of resources, but look, they already have spent millions in paying ad agencies.

Politics in this country is simply a game of perception. It's all about creating images that attract numbers. Adding to perception is numbers game. You've got to have numbers for you to be elected. And once elected, you've got to have numbers in the House and in the Senate for you to pass bills and resolutions.

Yes, our politics is a combination of bingo and TV. Numbers and images.

Our next president to be is caught in the web of old politics. Same faces. Same tactics. Same policies. Same ways of doing things. Money. Power. Influence. Same breed.

People ask me who will I choose as president on 2010. I replied, no one. I will not vote for a president. I did it in 2004 when I was a first time voter. The choices then were Gloria Arroyo, Fernando Poe, Panfilo Lacson, Raul Roco, Eddie Villanueva and Eddie Gil.

I was actually thinking of voting for Eddie Gil for fun. But I knew then that he would not win. So I did not vote for him.

I also did not vote a single senator. I did not vote for a district representative in the lone district of Mandaluyong. I did not vote for a mayor. And I did not vote for any municipal councilor.

But I went to polls. Yes, I voted.

I voted according to my conscience. There was only one vote I wrote on my ballot. It was a party list. Akbayan!

For 2010, I do not know yet if there is a real choice that would embody the aspirations of a people hungry for a new politics - for new ways of doing politics. Perhaps Among Ed or Nick Perlas. But I don't know whether they are the best choice.

One thing I am certain so far, popular presidential aspirants today are all the same. Now I realise the true meaning of a bible verse that says, "There's nothing new under the sun."

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